Is it time for a Kardashians reboot?
Since I’ve gotten a slew of new subscribers to this blog lately, perhaps it would be a good idea if I were to publish something new.
Since many of my visitors are from the United States, I could post some reflective observations on the role of a Special Prosecutor over the years, as well as questions regarding the investigatory powers of Special Prosecutors.
But that’s hard work, so I’m gonna write about TV and movie reboots instead.
I’m sure that you’ve noticed that Hollywood seems to have run out of ideas, and so they’re either bringing back old shows (“Roseanne” being the most recent example) or rebooting shows entirely. Just off of the top of my head, I thought of the following examples of the latter:
The Beverly Hillbillies
The Brady Bunch
The Parent Trap
In some of these cases, the reboots went to great lengths to be different than the originals. In the Brady Bunch reboot, the Bradys are their innocent 70s selves, surrounded by a much more modern world. In the Ghostbusters reboot, the new Ghostbusters are women. In the Mission: Impossible reboot, the world has been invaded by the spirits of alien beings from a distant planet…oh wait, I got that one wrong.
There’s only one problem that I see with this reboot mania. If they keep on rebooting, then all the scripted shows will be rebooted, and there won’t be anything left.
Except for the reality shows.
I know what you’re saying now. “John, how can you reboot a reality show?”
Well, if you can reboot the Brady Bunch without Robert Reed, and if you can reboot Charlie’s Angels without Farrah Fawcett, then you can reboot anything.
And I mean anything.
Yes, even “Keeping Up With The Kardashians.”
And yes, I know that the original Kardashians are still around (although Bruce has changed a bit over the years), but at some point the Reboot Gods are going to demand that this show be rebooted also.
With a twist.
So what kind of twist would “Keeping Up With the Kardashians” need to have for the Reboot Gods to be happy?
Ghostbusters provides the answer here. Instead of having Kardashians who are sexy white women, why not have Kardashians who are sexy black men?
I’ve even come up with plot summaries for the first few episodes.
Episode 1 introduces the Kardashian family: father Cedric, mother/stepmother Dionne, and children Keith, Kent, Kevin, Kurt, and Kyle. It’s just an average day in the Kardashian household: Cedric tries to sell Keith’s sex tape, Kevin goes modeling, and Kurt and Kyle spend the night in Monaco.
In Episode 2, the older Kardashian kids remember their mother Gloria Allred, a famous lawyer in her day. At one point a couple of the boys joke, “But Gloria’s not your REAL mother, Kevin.”
Episode 3 focuses on Keith’s desire for self-protection, his purchase of a gun, and his attempt to join the National Rifle Association.
Episode 4 shows the whole family (except Kyle) in Hawaii! They party all the time and meet the cast from the Hawaii Five-O reboot.
In episode 5, Kent walks into Dionne’s room and sees her holding a jock strap. “Why is she holding Dad’s jockstrap?” Kent asks to the ever-present camera. “It’s not my jockstrap,” Cedric reveals. The ending credits announce that A Very Special Episode will air in the November sweeps.